The Volunteer

What gives most people, men anyway, a sense of identity is work. What can't the Alzheimer's patient carry on successfully, work. What do they still want to do. Work. It is a mantra of Dad's that he wants to be useful. If you are a follower of the blogs, you know that can be dangerous to him and things he works with. Last Saturday he wanted to be useful so he went out and took off the dead stalks on the hollyhocks. Only, he lost his balance and fell down and hurt his hand. We had it checked out and it is nothing serious. It is, however, something that can happen when he wants to help.

So, what can he do? Well, he can play the piano. The fingers still have their touch. I am rather amazed coming from a musical family that playing the piano is really a big deal. Apparently not that many people either play or want to offer their skills for the enjoyment of others. How to connect his skill to his need to be useful? Enter the crisis. He can't go to the senior center anymore, although he doesn't know that. But, we have to get him out of the house so he doesn't go stir crazy. There is the other place he went that one day, the adult day care center that he felt so bothered by going to. He is functioning higher than them, in his own mind if not in total reality. Could they use a piano player? YES!!!

On Tuesday I took him over to see about "volunteering" at the center. He was an immediate hit with the clients. He can volunteer to play for them two mornings a week and then stay to "help" the other clients with their needs the rest of the day. He is getting the care that he needs in an environment that is good for him and is able to feel totally useful. YEAH! Today was his first full day and aside from missing my wife's good cooking for lunch, he had a good time. There is another advantage. He thinks it's on the same day as he was going to the senior center, and I am not going to tell him otherwise, but on the downlow, it isn't. He doesn't know, but he does know that he is now the useful man, Joe the Volunteer.