I think we have been here before. NO! I won't go there again. Those people have problems and I don't want to be around people who don't know what they are doing! We have tried to point out that he is a volunteer but that hasn't changed his attitude. We have tried to remind him of the fun he had said he was having, but that hasn't changed his attitude. Now that he can't go to the senior center and won't go to "volunteer" at the adult day care center, he is back home with us 24/7 again.
This time it has about broken the bank of reserve strength. Jac and I have about run out of steam. We had been so happy to have him go someplace twice a week. Now he is back and grumpier than ever.
At the end of breakfast dishes he gets out the cribbage board and cards. Jac no longer sits with him to play in the morning. He is frustrated and goes to his room. Jac tries to get things done around the house but feels guilty about putting him off. After lunch out comes the board and cards again. Frustration again for both. Someone who doesnt' understand what is going on with him suggested we make a schedule so he will know when he can play and when he can't. I think I wrote something about suggestions in this spot a month or so ago. They are about as welcome as a bad case of the flu. The follow up question always get around to, have you tried my suggestion yet? Only more frustration for more people. Schedules are about as effective for an alzheimer's patient as for a 2 month old child. They set their own. Period. Now, if all those with suggestions would just change their suggestion to "can I come and take your dad for a day?" I would change my opinions about suggestions. I might even smile broadly, laugh hilariously or something roughly akin to that.
How about a nursing home others have asked. Right now he is pretty aware and alert about 3 days a week. I mean that on those days it would take some time with him to see any signs of the disease. Other days it takes just long enough for him to open his mouth, or it takes just a few minutes watching him go through the motions of the day to see it clearly. He isn't physically violent, he doesn't wander from the home and he doesn't soil himself. A home seems to me a bit over the top at the present. I just keep reminding myself that others are doing this and we can too. Others remind us also that they know what we are going through, they share their own experiences (often much worse than ours) and that really helps the day along.
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