Waiting

Now that Dad has officially been placed on the list for a local nursing home, the wait begins. There are a whole lot of nursing homes in our county. We visited all but one of them. The one we didn't visit had no one give me even a small recommendation of its quality. We had tours, talked with nursing directors, got papers, went on line to the official government web site for nursing homes and prayed and looked some more. We are happy with our decision, but it may be a while before we realize it.

This summer was a horrible one in our area weather wise. It began in May with a huge tornado that killed eight people and destroyed hundreds of homes and damaged hundreds more to a great extent. Our area is populated by elderly people. Many of them lived in these homes. Their children would come in multiple times a week to check on mom and dad and take general care of them. Now there are no homes for mom and dad to live in. The children cannot take them into their own homes. The result is that nursing homes were suddenly inundated with new residents. That was round one. Three weeks later a 500 year flood hit our area. The water rose and rose and rose. It was 3 blocks from our house and we live on a hill seven blocks from the river. The storm drains on our block were starting to back up and put water into our street. Hundreds of homes in our city were hit hard. Again, we are an older area and the same as with the tornado, seniors who were barely managing in their homes with the help of their children were displaced into nursing homes. Because they were seniors in need of assistance anyway, it is unlikely that any of them will be rebuilding their homes and returning there. Nursing homes in our area are stuffed.

We are on the waiting list. How long? Dad needs nursing home care. It is apparent every day. We have been providing him nursing home level care for 3 years. The toll is starting to show. How long? We have added a home health aide to the mix of his care. She comes twice weekly to bathe him. The visiting nurse now comes twice monthly instead of once monthly. How long? It is possible that he has had one or more TIA's (small strokes) this summer, but that is difficult to determine. It is common at his level of need to have them and there are some signs that he has. How long? He is increasingly confused and communication is less clear. He can process almost nothing which is said to him anymore. How long? We have committed to taking care of him as long as it takes. We are also hoping that it isn't that much longer. Our goal was to have him placed by November 1. That is still our goal. How long? The whole situation has racheted up the stress level. It is beginning to be our descent, not just his. How long? As long as it takes. That is the way it is with family. We will be there to be the sunshine in his descent as long at it takes. (But hopefully, it will be by November 1.) :)